Day 7

It's day 7 and all is going well. Aside from a few sleepless nights and the most adorable little girl attached to my hip, we are steadily getting back into the groove of things. Having a new little person in our family has definitely been a life changing event, but we are trying to make things as normal as possible, especially for Austin.

Here's a recap of our first few days together:

Day 3, Friday
With the entire family in tow, we took Bethany to her first pediatrician appointment. She received a clean bill of health from the doctor as well as two shots. Since we were in L.A., we decided to visit my parents and possibly eat dinner together. We were a bit hesitant to eat out, not knowing how Bethany would fare in a restaurant setting, but we decided to give it a try anyway. We had an early dinner at one of our favorite Korean restaurants, Gil Mok, where fortunately for us, Bethany did great. She sat content in the highchair most of the time as I wolfed down my dinner. I wolfed down my dinner not because I was so hungry and not because the food was so delicious (although it was), but because I wanted to finish my dinner before she started to fuss. She did get a little cranky toward the end of my meal so I just held her until we left the restaurant.

One day Bethany will learn to use those chopsticks.

Day 4, Saturday

We decided to take Austin to one of his favorite places, Travel Town. Most of you already know that Austin has had a special love for trains ever since he was about two years old and it was actually quite an obsession for several years. Although he has developed other "obsessions", he has never and will probably never outgrow his love for trains.

Day 5, Sunday

We played it by ear on Sunday morning and were blessed to be able to attend church. When we drove into the parking lot we saw some of the kids playing in the playground. As soon as they saw us, they all came running toward us to meet Bethany. Then I guess word got out because within seconds, people came out of the sanctuary to greet us. Bethany was quite the celebrity all day and it warmed my heart to have our church family welcome her with open arms. Thank you HBC!

 "You forgot to eat the rest of your chocolate cake Daddy."

Perhaps it is antics like this that delay Bethany's bonding with Daddy.... ;)

Day 6, Monday

Our church family is so dear and special to us for many reasons. They have been a huge source of encouragement and support on our journey to adopting Bethany and have showered her with so much love upon her arrival. One of the many ways they continue to show their love and support is by bringing meals to our family. As soon as they heard Bethany was coming, meal sign ups began and last night was the first night with Eugene and Esther.

Thank you for dinner Uncle Eugene and Auntie Esther!

Apparently Bethany didn't find our dinner conversation very interesting.

Going....

going.....

gone.

Sleep

Not only is Bethany's sleep affected by jet lag but also by her new surroundings. After having been used to sleeping on the floor beside her foster mother, I imagine the crib seems more like a lonely jail than a place of rest. With her unique circumstances in mind, our plan these first few nights has been to wait until Bethany gets sleepy or falls asleep in our arms and then carefully transfer her to the crib.
 

Wednesday, Thursday and Friday night she woke up several times crying (this girl can cry!) and did not want anything to do with the crib. We tried to soothe her back to sleep while in the crib but when that didn't work we held her again or we slept with her on the floor. Sometimes we even came downstairs to feed her or have a short time of play.
 

Saturday and Sunday night were the same except that she seemed to be a bit more comfortable in her crib so we didn't have to sleep on the floor. Sunday night was a particularly rough and sleepless night but it was also the night that Sam and Bethany became a bit more bonded. Hooray! It happened in the wee hours of the morning, somewhere in the midst of all the crying and delirium from lack of sleep. Prior to that night she was not too fond of Sam and would frequently cry at the mere sight of him. She would track him with the corner of her eye and if he got too close, she would lose it. After that night, she now lets him come close, gives him a smile or two and even gives him kisses. I know it makes Sam very happy as he's been so patient with Bethany and eagerly waiting for her to bond with him.

Last night (Monday) was also a huge night for us as she fell asleep at 8pm (soon after the highchair incident above). Sam and I kept checking the video monitor thinking she would wake up any second but all she did was fuss a little and then fall right back asleep (whew!). It's nearing 10am right now and she is still fast asleep. We are wondering when and if we should wake her, but with all the trouble she's had with sleeping lately, we're thinking we should let her sleep as long as she needs. Or at least until Auntie EJ gets here. :)

Here's hoping Day 7 goes just as well!

Finally, A Family of Four!

Thank you to everyone for your overwhelming love and support. We appreciate all of your prayers and well wishes. For the most part Bethany is doing amazingly well. I woke up Wednesday morning hoping for the best and preparing for the worst, and God was gracious to give us a wonderful first meeting. I was just as calm as the night before and I attribute it to the fact that after waiting five long years, I was more than ready for this day to come.

From our very first meeting in San Francisco, Bethany took to me very well and did not cry at all until her first diaper change. She seems to be fairly easy going but, as noted in her previous Well Baby Checks and her Pre-Flight Report, she definitely lets you know when she is not happy.

We were concerned about the plane ride home, but she fell asleep in my arms before take off and slept the whole way through, much to the relief of the passengers around us, and myself of course. I was also concerned about the car ride home, but again, she fell right asleep in her new car seat. So far so good right?

Once home we quickly discovered a few things.
She does not like:

• baths (her Pre-Flight Report stated she liked baths but apparently she did not care for the one we gave her)
• diaper changes 
• clothing changes
• the intial strapping in part of the car seat and highchair
• when I'm out of her sight
• Daddy's coarse dry hands (Daddy better pour on that lotion!)

She does like:

• to eat (snacks, baby food, milk, you name it, she likes it!)
• to be held
• her big brother
• to sleep on her tummy
• to be sung to (Sam and I have been singing the handful of Korean songs we know over and over again)

Last night was a bit tough for us (but better than we expected) as she was still on Korea time and we were trying to figure out her schedule. We are trying to follow her normal sleeping and eating schedule as much as possible but all the while also trying to slowly and carefully adjust her to American time. She first fell asleep at about 7:40pm and we cautiously placed her inside the crib (in Korea she slept next to her Foster Mother on the floor every night). Sam and I thought it was too good to be true and we were right. She woke up about an hour later and then slept on and off until about 3:30am but never back in the crib. We then gave her a bottle (she drinks 8 ounces!) and some snacks and then she slept on the living room floor until 11:40am. Sam and I were able to sleep here and there but I'd have to say that Sam did the bulk of the staying up as he says his first priority is to keep me as healthy as possible. Thanks Sam!

Once she was up for the day, she had another 8 ounce bottle, snacks/food, playtime, a nap and then we went to Babies R Us. She cried during her bath again and fell asleep from 7:30pm-11:00pm in her crib. We fed her a bottle and some baby food, played a bit and she finally went back to sleep moments ago at 1am on the floor of her bedroom.

We are so thankful for such a smooth transition so far and pray it will only get better and better. I instantly felt like she was part of our family when I first held her in my arms and hope she feels the same way too. We are so thankful for our daughter and praise God for His great faithfulness.

Now for some pictures! For the sake of time and me squeezing in some sleep before she wakes up again, I'll only post a handful of pictures from our time in San Francisco and then hopefully follow up with the rest another day. I also want to post pictures from the homecoming we received from our dear friends and family at LAX. Stay tuned...

Packing up the car at 5am to catch our plane to San Franciso

Our hotel room at the Mariott

(a big thanks to our friends Norma and Wesley for the room!)

Wednesday morning at 5:45am just before I woke up my two sleepy heads.

Her flight from Seoul is on time!

Passing time while Bethany clears customs.

Here she comes with her escort!

(austin took this picture)

(and this one too)

Our very first meeting

Bethany and Daddy

Next is big brother's turn.

Group picture with the other babies, escorts, volunteers and Auntie Mia.

(thank you to mia, norma and warren for joining us on such a special day and for taking video and photos. we are so grateful!)

As we were waiting for takeoff, Bethany fell asleep in my arms.

She also fell asleep on the ride home.

Her first night home.

Before  I head off to bed I'll leave you with this shot of us playing.

Is It Morning Yet?

After getting less than four hours of sleep, we arrived in San Francisco early this morning and had a fun and eventful day. We spent the day with Mia, my sister in law and also met up with our cousin Grace, her boyfriend and our friends John and Sakura. We are finally back in our hotel room and winding down as we watch the Winter Olympics.

Sam is feeling quite anxious, Austin is fast asleep and I am surprisingly calm and relaxed. Tomorrow I will finally meet my daughter face to face! After waiting for so long, it seems unreal that we are now only separated by a few hours. I am so excited to see her and hold her in my arms and pray she will quickly come to know just how much we love her. 

Please pray for our first few hours together as a family as most of it will be spent waiting around at the airport for our flight back to Los Angeles. I will update and post pictures as soon as I am able. Please pray for us.

It's Official - She's Coming Home!

After a very stressful week, our adoption agency confirmed this morning that Bethany will in fact arrive in San Francisco on Wednesday, the 17th. We tried as best we could to switch her flight over to LAX, but apparently nothing could be done. Sam and I will be flying to San Francisco on Tuesday and returning home with Bethany on Wednesday.

Our daughter is finally coming home!

Only 6 more days to go!

Gains and Losses

What I failed to mention in my last post was that we were actually expecting Bethany to arrive this Friday but were waiting to receive confirmation today before we made it public. It's a good thing we did because I just found out from Lisa at our agency that by the time she got back in touch with Korea, all the flights for Friday had already been booked. Currently there is a shortage of flights because The Lunar New Year is coming up and it's always a very busy time for travel in Korea. Hopefully, we will hear something soon after the new year.

I knew I would be disappointed if it didn't happen Friday but I didn't realize just how disappointed and emotional I would be. Let's just say there is a lot less Kleenex at our house now. I know it's just a few extra days but I honestly thought the wait was finally over. Although I wish Bethany were in my arms right now, I trust that God's timing is good and perfect. That truth doesn't make my sadness go away but it does give me hope and the ability to rejoice in the midst of it.

The good news is that Bethany is in fact ready to come home and it's just a matter of waiting for an available flight. Also, someone on the Holt boards reminded me that this gives Bethany a few extra days with her foster family, the only family she has ever known. When I think about it from that perspective, I feel so selfish to want to bring her home so quickly. I can only imagine the heartache her foster family must be feeling as they prepare to let go of someone they have loved and cared for for the past ten months.

I realize that most of the time we tend to view adoption only as gains. For example, the child "gains" a new family, the adoptive family "gains" a new member.... but far too often we forget about the incredible losses felt by not only the child, but by the foster family, birth parents and the community around her. As our family rejoices at our "gain", there are those who at the same time will be grieving the loss of a loved one. I hope that in the midst of my joy, I will remember and pray for those Bethany has left behind.

"Flight Ready"

This morning I was on my way to a doctor appointment when I received a call from Lisa at our agency. She wanted to let me know they had received an email from Korea stating Bethany was "flight ready". However, before making final arrangements Korea wanted to confirm one last time that we were still comfortable with the two minor medical concerns which were noted in her previous medical check ups. I told her we were fine with it and Lisa said she would pass along the information to Korea. She said come Monday she should know exactly when Bethany would be coming home.

I will post again when I find out more on Monday. C'mon Monday!

Confessions of a Stalker

Our adoption has turned me into a stalker. I stalk my inbox. I stalk my mailbox. I stalk the Holt Bulletin Boards. I stalk other adoptive parents' blogs. My name is Jenny and I am a stalker...

I admit I can get pretty obsessive, especially when it comes to my email. I find myself constantly checking throughout the day hoping for any news or updates on our paperwork, our progress and especially any news on Bethany. Most of the time my stalking reaps no benefits. But those handful of times when I do receive an email are what keep me coming back for more and more and more.... 

And guess what? Today just happened to be one of those days. After being out for most of the morning and afternoon, I returned home to find an email from Holt. It was titled "New Photos" and my heart started racing. Austin and I looked at the pictures together and my heart melted at the sight of my little girl. My emotions got the best of me and I started crying - crying because I was so happy to have new pictures and crying because I wanted her home so badly. Ok, I think I might start crying again so I'll just hurry up and share the photos. Enjoy!

Bethany at 9 months (most likely taken on January 2nd)

Thank you God for watching over our little one while we are so far apart.